Forcing My Way Into Happiness
Do you ever try to talk yourself into happiness? I do that. I'm doing that now. Looking all around me, trying to see the positive, searching for the beauty in life so I can be happy. I used to be such a happy optimistic person. From all outward appearances, I still am. No one wants to see the ugly bruised and bleeding part of me that I hide inside. I still want to be that sunny rosey happy person that I used to be. But I am forever changed. Is there a REAL part of me, that's still happy, still somewhere deep inside, wanting to fight its way out and replace the fake plastic facade that I wear now? I have to hope so.
posted by Lynne at 8:43 AM
3 Comments:
Hi Lynne, you have a blog! I saw you commented on Kristin's, as Levi's mommy, and i immediately thought of you...
Welcome to the blogsphere, as they call it.
I don't know if there is a real happy part of you, i hope so. Maybe you will see her, in flashes, more often if you stop trying to force her to be there. I just hate the plastic face too...but i wear it anyway. And some days it hurts so much, that it has to be on.
Oh, also, i will link your blog to mine (if it is okay) when i update my links, i have to do that. And can you post the picture of Kailey's tree? I don't get the attachments on SBSL but i want to see...
Hello, Kate! Thank you for commenting on my blog. I actually became inspired to begin a blog about my losses, after reading yours and the links to others you shared. (Thank you for that, and yes please feel free to link mine as well!) I needed a place to be my real true self -- the good, the bad, and the ugly! (okay, maybe not much of the good! ;) I have posted a picture of Kailey's tree for you to see.
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